Gratitude is All I've Got

Routine:

Every conversation about possible life after university has led me to say “I am grateful for the routine university gives me,” because it has served as purpose for my neuro divergent self.

Friendship:

But even more than that, I'm grateful for the friends I have made. I mean, just how much can you do with routine if it's just you in it? It gets monotonous fast and soon after, so fucking boring.

But the people in this routine have made it worthwhile. So you can guess my response to “favourite moment about school” in the FYB form.

Yes, “the moment I spent with friends” was my response. Friends I wouldn't have met had my life been planned around going to a different university for a different Bachelor's degree 6 years ago.

And I'm a really nostalgic person.

As nostalgic as we get. Such that now that my 6 years in this 5 years course, is coming to an end, I find myself looking out for my day ones. I find myself wanting to reconnect with them, spend more quality time. You know, leave an impact of some sorts. For something to remember each other by.

And the slow realisation that:

Because the university itself has left a lot of impact on me. One moment you feel like you have all the time in the world. It's 5 years, then a long strike, it's 4 years, then SIWES and before you know it, it's 2 semesters left and when it's the final lap you just can't help but want to recount everything.

That's the nostalgia in all of us. This feeling of wanting to hold on to everything and at the same time, knowing to let go. The excitement of wanting to become a graduate and enter the "real world". And the innocence of wanting to stay within these 4 walls and pretend like that's all there is to life. One moment you are taking this slow, a day at a time. Writing CBT, an examination at a time and the next moment it's the final exam. Soon enough, the final week.

The final moment.

The final experience, but what makes that experience worthwhile?

…That I'm a different person:

It has to be unique for everybody. However, in that uniqueness, there is the singularity.

Every single one of us has gotten to know ourselves better. No one person is the same as they were 5 years ago.

And that really is what matters in life.

That you are a better, more solid version readies you enough for what comes after.