Entropy

There are ideas that come slowly, and there are ideas that arrive almost like an interruption.

Final Thoughts came to me on a random morning. I was at my desk, and before I had even fully understood what I was thinking, I had picked up my phone, called a friend, and bought the domain name. All of it happened within about an hour.

Looking back, I think the idea came from a feeling I had been carrying for a while. There were too many things bottled in. Too many experiences, memories, lessons, worries, regrets, questions, and unfinished thoughts that I wanted to talk about, especially now that school is beginning to feel like something I am already preparing to leave.

Being in 500 level feels strange. It is heavy and sweet at the same time. There is the joy of knowing that many things are gradually coming to an end: the 7 a.m. classes, the lectures we missed, the not-so-beautiful encounters with lecturers, the long nights before exams, the stress of trying to survive one semester after another.

But there is also the terrifying question of "what comes next?".

That is the feeling behind this first issue.

The theme is The Beginning of the End, because that is exactly where we are. We are close enough to the end to start feeling nostalgic, but not far enough from it to understand everything clearly. We are still inside the experience, still confused by some of it, still grateful for some of it, still trying to make sense of what these years have done to us.

We started Final Thoughts because we believe many people are carrying these same thoughts quietly. I would personally love to read what other people are thinking at this stage of their lives. I want to know what they are afraid of, what they are grateful for, what they regret, what they are beginning to understand, and what they still cannot explain.

And beyond those of us who are almost done, I also think there is something here for students in lower levels. Maybe they will read these pieces and understand school a little differently. Maybe they will avoid some mistakes. Maybe they will feel less alone when their own confusion starts.

Honesty in expressing what it really feels like. That's the underlying idea.

Through these entries, I hope we are able to give language to some of the things people feel but rarely say. I hope someone reads a piece and thinks, “This is exactly how I feel.” I hope someone feels nostalgia, or hope, or courage, or even discomfort. Anything real is enough.

I am proud that this first issue is finally going out. I am super grateful to everyone who has helped push the idea from a random thought into something you can actually read.

Welcome to Final Thoughts.

Welcome to the beginning of the end.